I’ll be honest. The last few days have been really challenging for me. It’s not my intention to get political here but I also have to share that I am deeply saddened by what I see happening in our country. I have been struggling for days to find something that I was inspired to write about. Unable to find anything, I decided to just be honest as to what I am feeling and why this newsletter is late this morning.
As I have been interacting with others, I’ve come to realize I’m not alone in how I’m feeling. In order to move through these feelings I have had to allow myself to stew in them. It’s the only way to move through and out of the muck. Fortunately, I have an amazingly loving and kind partner who is patient and supportive of allowing this process. Denying how we feel doesn’t resolve anything. I had to admit that I was feeling angry, frustrated and sad all at the same time. Tears have been streaming down my face in my morning practice and meditation for the last few days.
Those of you who know me, understand that I am a glass is half full kind of person. I truly believe there is a reason for everything even if we don’t know it at the time or if we never figure out why. I’m finding myself slowly crawling out from this hole. Finally, there were no tears on my mat this morning. I guess that’s something. For now I will take that as enough. To know that how ever I am showing up today – I am enough. The fact that this blog is just a bit of sharing random thoughts, that is enough. It may not be full of inspiration but I am just being honest about where I am at right now – that is enough.
What ever you are feeling right now, just allow yourself to be in it. Give your self permission to truly be you today whom ever that is and know that’s all perfect. The following is a poem by Danna Faulds from her book “Go In and In” that I think speaks to what I am trying to share here:
It’s enough to offer love, no matter how imperfectly received or given.
It’s enough to try and fail at a difficult task; enough to fall and rise, stumble, fall again, sigh, and start however slowly, in the direction the soul points.
It’s enough to seek peace and find pain, to gain nothing but a vision of truth, and take the long route home.
It’s enough to feel temptation, the dance of the senses, the hot pull of desire; enough to call on God, walk through fire, sleep and cry and fear or welcome dying.
It’s enough to be and breath, to feel the touch of wind on skin.
It’s enough to take the day as it comes, to watch the ripples on the lake as the rock sinks to the bottom, to see the wild reflection of the surface calm into a mirror once again.
It’s enough to hear the voice of fear and hide, or seek it out and face the shame or shadows.
It’s enough to set out to tame the demons and watch them multiply instead. It’s enough to be buffeted by the winds of change and not blown over.
I and you and all of us, more than enough.
Om shanti, shanti, shanti