We have Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, Twitter, Email, phone calls, texting, Skype, Facetime, Google Hangouts and more. We have this broad spectrum of ways to communicate and we all aren’t the same channel. We are busy, distracted and in overwhelm and we are not managing our communication with one another well. Most of us.
When we reach out to some one, regardless of the media, it is because we would like a response from that person in a timely manner. What is the message we receive and what is the message you send when you don’t respond in an appropriate amount of time?
**The subject is not important to warrant my attention right now.
**You are not important enough to answer.
**I don’t have respect for you or your time.
**You aren’t as important as I am
Whether or not any of it is true, it doesn’t feel good.
What is the appropriate amount of time? The million dollar question! What I am realizing is that it is VERY different for each of us.
When a client or friend reaches out to me, I have an agreement with myself to respond within 24 hours. To me that is showing respect of my time and their time. Is right for me to assume that with others? No. Unless I have an agreement with all those I communicate with, that we will always get back to one another within 24 hours, I can’t be upset or place my expectations on that person. So to reduce my frustration in communication I am learning to make agreements with others, especially in my business, that we will get back to one another in an agreed upon length of time. So by clarifying my expectations or making a specific agreement I eliminate much of my frustration. Now I move into trust with those people and feel respected.
The other obstacle here is; Are we communicating with that person in a way that they use most often? In other words, if I post a private message on Facebook and they are only on that particular social media source once a week, would that be the place to leave a message? Some of us prefer texting, others a phone call and still others are regular Facebook users and have all their messages go through there. When we are expecting clear communication from someone the responsibility is on us to ask them how they would prefer to do that. We can’t assume they love email just because we do.
**So let’s all begin to ask each other how we prefer to communicate.
**Enter agreements as to what a reasonable amount of time is.
**If we don’t have a huge amount of time to answer right away let’s at least acknowledge that we received the message and will get back to them in X amount of time so we don’t leave the other person hanging.
The outcome to this is I get to enjoy my communication with others. Dread and frustration no longer exist.
What ways do you have for getting clear with your communication with others? Give some of these techniques a go and share how they are working for you. I know I can’t be the only one feeling this today!
Om Shanti, Shanti, Shanti